A rather amusing but accurate article regarding the offerings and service at many food establishments.
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I have to say I was in fits of laughter, BUT so much of this is absolutely true, but whether these ‘cafes’ will sit up and take notice is another matter.
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To this I would add: Serving a brown luke warm beverage optimistically described as ‘tea’.
With all the fancy-schmancy coffee varieties available these days, why can no-one make tea? Apart from being served tea made with tea bags (thanks, I can do that at home), my all time favourite is the cafe that provided a cup of luke warm water with the tea bag AT THE SIDE. So I have to do virtually all the work, and end up with luke warm brown water …
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That is called a deconstructed tea and may cost extra 
Hot water could be an option (such as a double shot espresso) you should explore with the server/proprietor. Only a modest additional charge?
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In parts of the big city perhaps there are more ‘punters’ than seats at the cafe tables. And many who who see value in ways the rest of us do not?
I prefer the quieter rural or hidden urban spots. Cafes in those locations need repeat business and depend on word of mouth. Any that choose to offer poor value and poor service soon disappear.
From the local ‘free’ rag. GCNews
I’ve politely left out the acknowledgment of the local whose name followed the letter to the paper. The local rag respectfully relying on local business and perhaps also mindful of the communities defining liberal values has not published the name of the business. Is this what ‘having a go’ is?
In defence of the rag, they only have one side of the story, although there are reportedly seven witnesses!
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Sometimes I feel sorry for the cafe staff, my partner orders ‘deconstructed’ muesli where all the bits come in separate bowls so that she can mix them to her exact requirements. She also asks for her coffee in a particularly shaped mug which retains the heat better than the wide cups they normally use. The staff smile and are helpful, blissfully unaware of the acquired brain injury which is responsible for this fastidious behaviour- and they do it on minimum wage and without penalty rates. Now if I can only get them to serve my breakfast on a warm plate, life will be perfect.
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This article sums up perfectly a whole lot of issues that are irritating me about current dining standards. Who decided that eating meals on a plank of wood was a great idea? Who decided to ditch table service for the “order at the counter and take a number on a stick” system? Who decided that 30cm high burgers were in any way possible to eat? etc etc etc. I agree with ALL of the issues in this article.
Now… we just have to get the ever growing number of food service places to listen to what customers actually want and return to good, old fashioned service.
Perhaps some website, or another proverbial app, could rank food outlets in your local area on exactly the details listed in this article - such a website would be very popular and might actually make the local eateries take notice.
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It would be a very interesting site.
There is a lot of competition in that space already.
We often refer to Trip Advisor when looking for options when travelling in Australia.
There are also options such as
- https://www.goodfood.com.au/eat-out/good-food-guides
- https://www.thefork.com.au/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIuvft-YvE4gIVgiQrCh0nmQHlEAAYASAAEgLkY_D_BwE
- https://www.quandoo.com.au/
- https://www.opentable.com.au/?ref=16159&SP=ppc_g_au_nontm&LS=gglppc&MID=au_nontm&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIuvft-YvE4gIVgiQrCh0nmQHlEAAYAiAAEgLWZ_D_BwE&gclsrc=aw.ds
And any local cafe usually has a “like us on Facebook” message at the bottom of the menu.
Which is really a way of saying perhaps - if you don’t like us please don’t comment on Facebook?
When we walk into a major urban shopping centre or shopping district, it usually a once or twice a year event. Choosing where to eat at lunchtime remains the biggest challenge of the day, often now avoided by just having a coffee and indulging in a cake. And at a price that makes us wonder how anyone could afford a meal at many of these places.
The best guide might be to look for the que or busiest cafes. Choose one and come back after peak lunch? And feel assured that if the meal is rubbish, you are not the only bunny.
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One of the cafes’ problems is differentiation. With the plethora of competitors in many places having good food, good service, and good prices is (sadly) sometimes not enough. Success in these times requires a certain amount of ‘look at me’ and they use whatever social media and the media are on about at the time, but again there are so many so the ‘flavour of the day’ gets pushed to extremes.
Ancillaries that matter: decor, view, vibe, influencers, … , … some of these far more so in metro areas, and even more so in hipster subsurbs, but it is what it is sometimes.
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Another excellent article regarding sub-standard food and non-existent customer service.
Pity the author didn’t name the “restaurant” but hopefully he provided some suitable online reviews for them.
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